Life Hacks, Novels and Creative Writing, Trigger Warning!, Uncategorised, Uncategorized

Benefits of Counselling for Rainbow Sunshine444 (Part 1 of 5)

I recently lost a friend.

I lost her because I set a boundary.

This is the boundary: for her to be in my life, she had to attend counselling at least fortnightly.

In the state that I live in, she could access free fortnightly counselling because she is a victim of serious crime and child abuse.

She doesn’t feel the need to work on her issues.

I can understand that.

But I’m not standing on the deck of her ship going down with her.

If she wants to be in my life, she’s going to have to bail some of the water out and try to row for shore instead of intentionally drowning herself.

She asked me for advice as to what she should talk about in counselling.

Here is part 1 of 5 of my suggestions:

Victim/Abuser Radar Sensitivity Training:

RainbowSunshine444 was the victim of physical assaults and frequent emotional abuse from her mother as a child. She is still the victim of regular emotional abuse from her mother. This abuse has never stopped, because she has never moved out of home or separated from her Mum. I have witnessed this behaviour over the past 8 years, and I believe her when she says that it occurred s a child.

She has also internalized her mother’s voice, and insults and berates herself internally as well as having to listen to her mother’s abuse externally.

However, RainbowSunshine444 perceives nearly everyone external to her as abusing her. I have witnessed her label anyone who respectfully suggested she do something helpful in her life as an abuser. I have witnessed her label people abusers for doing something as simple as falling in love and moving out of a share house.

I have witnessed her label people who pay for her drinks and her food and treat her respectfully as abusers. I have witnessed her label people who habitually beat women as “pussy cats” and people who set respectful boundaries with her as “abusive c**ts”.

I have witnessed her claim that the child exploitation and trafficking that she was also a victim of is not abuse. I have witnessed her claim that her Mum does not abuse her.

It is clear to me that she has no f**kn idea what abuse is, and she desperately needs to learn what is and what isn’t inappropriate behaviour. The best place she can learn how to do this is counselling.

So that’s the first thing I think she would benefit from learning about in counselling:

Victim/Abuser Radar Sensitivity Training.

Life Hacks, Novels and Creative Writing, politics, Uncategorised, Uncategorized

Disorderly Gratitude

Neurodivergence:

An interesting word

So many “disorders”

Words used to describe

Completely natural variance.

What words do I use

To describe myself?

Who am I?

How do I define my selfness inside my head?

Change can bring joy

Am I a disorder?

DID, Autism, PTSD?

All of those are just words

Used to characterise coping mechanisms or brain states.

Are my coping mechanisms a disease?

Or a super-power?

Am I disabled?

Or upgraded?

In truth, I see myself as

A capable human dealing with

Pressure and pain

In the best way I can.

I have a lot of help,

And I am grateful.

I have a lot of awe and love,

And I am grateful.

You hear me, God?

It’s not that things aren’t shit sometimes,

It’s that I look at the amazing life I’m living,

And I am grateful.

Thanks for reading my blog. Would love to hear your thoughts and comments below.

Life Hacks, Novels and Creative Writing, Uncategorised, Uncategorized

Marriage, a Poem

This is a reply to the MTB: Two by Two prompt on dVerse Poet’s Pub

It’s not strictly couplets, but it’s my take on the subject matter.

Hope you enjoy!

Marriage

I know which one is my husband’s breathing

As I listen at the top of the stairs

He arrives, smiling, on the third floor chest heaving

We have a kiss—my fingers in his hair

My husband knows the difference between discretion and valour

He thinks I don’t—but I’m not sure if that’s true.

I watch him when he’s sick—his pain; his pallor;

Stroking his head, and rubbing his shoulders, too.

The daily cares we soothe each other,

Discuss the hours we’ve spent in other’s lives

Talking about philosophy and science,

I hold him close and comfort when he cries.

I married a man of integrated kindness,

Though neither one of us can cope with too much pain,

We slip into the ocean ‘never mind us!’

Or walk the forest paths for inner gains.

Thanks for visiting my blog, feel free to click around and read the other entries.

Thank you.

Beauty
Novels and Creative Writing, Uncategorised, Uncategorized

d’Verse Poets Octelle

This is a response to the d’Verse poetry prompt ‘Octelle’

It’s not a perfect example, but I had fun doing it, and I thank Grace very much for posting.

Grey skies meld into purple light

Mottled, marbled but piercing bright

The edges move, stir and shift,

Illuminate rain that banks and drifts

Coursing, creating living souls

Growth of plants, creatures, life, and mould

Grey skies meld into purple light

Mottled, marbled but piercing bright

Thanks for reading!

https://dversepoets.com/author/somethingm/

Life Hacks, Novels and Creative Writing, politics, Trigger Warning!, Uncategorised, Uncategorized

WDYS#145 Sadje from Keeping it Alive

Thanks to Sadje from Keeping it Alive for her What Do You See prompt #145

Photo Credit: https://unsplash.com/@malonsophoto

Silent secrets: Communicating abuse

The artist’s white rose heart

Bursting out of the page

Reaching for anyone who might be able to help

Jewellery—there’s no lack of money,

Just lacking compassion, and empathy.

Trying, failing, trying, to speak

The longing to say words

For the sounds to tumble out of my mouth

Forbidden speech–

The despair of silence.

The effort of work that is

Helping someone understand,

While unable to utter a single word

Of truth.

I got help from https://steppingout.org.au